Growing up, we were surrounded by phrases like “A dream does not become a reality through magic; it takes sweat, determination, and hard work,” so we invariably worked hard at all of our dreams without pausing to take care of ourselves.
Taking care of ourselves is important, but many of us find it difficult to do it on a regular basis. Self-care is frequently perceived as selfish, but it does not have to be. In fact, taking care of ourselves can be one of the most selfless acts we can perform while caring for someone with autism.
This past weekend, I was sitting alone in the lounge of the Four Points Sheraton Hotel, thinking about the 1001 things that suddenly jolted my mind and almost made my staycation impossible. When it got to 3 p.m. on the day I was supposed to check in, I suddenly became uneasy and felt there weren’t enough groceries for the night, so I dashed out to do some grocery shopping. Then I became concerned that there wasn’t enough preferred food for my picky eater son, so I had to prepare his favorite meal-Jollof spaghetti and meatballs, and then came another thought that there wasn’t enough stew in the house, so I had to make a pot of goat meat stew, and things just kept creeping in till my husband asked if I wasn’t going on my planned trip. I was only staying away for one night, but it just seems so easy for us to neglect our own self-care in order to care for our loved ones. After all, they require our help and support, and we want to be there for them. However, it’s important to remember that if you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be able to take care of them.
Here are some self-care activities I engage in to maintain my physical, spiritual, and mental health.
- Intellectually, I search for fresh works on subjects that interest me. I read books, listen to thought-provoking podcasts, and regularly keep my spirit up with good music.
- In terms of my spiritual discipline, I challenge myself to listen to or read aloud portions of two different books of the bible every day, pray for at least 30 minutes each day, and to meditate at least three times per week.
- Social – I get in touch with a couple of friends and have sincere, grown-up conversations with them. I occasionally go out to socialize and participate actively in a support group to encourage people around me.
- Physically, I jog for 30 minutes once or twice a week and get at least 7 hours of sleep – four times a week.
- Emotional – In my journal, I write down things I am grateful for and simply reflect on my thoughts and emotions.
When we are well rested, nourished, and caring for our physical, spiritual, and mental health, we can show up in ways that we cannot when we are exhausted. So, if you’ve been struggling to find more time for yourself, keep in mind that you’re not being selfish; you simply need to do better for yourself in order to care for your loved ones.
Photo by Brandy Kennedy on Unsplash
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